Saturday, March 5, 2011

It's just like M. Night Shyamalan's plant movie . . .

Do you know what happens when you're recovering from an allergic reaction to a moldy old building and then the oak trees start blooming as if they were on steroids?

Your very brief allergies become very LOOOOONG ones. for over two weeks, now, I have been hacking up and sneezing out the most disgusting green slime you have ever seen. Oh I'm well enough to go to work, and it's not contagious and all that. I just might have to go to rehab for all the decongestant I'm consuming.

Oh, and I've made an important discovery.
Wait for it.
I am . . .
[Pause for dramatic effect]
. . . loogie-impaired.
Yup. It's not that I won't it's that I CAN'T. My poor little esophagus just doesn't know how to force itself to spit up. It hates the puking so much, it won't let me loosen the revolting goop from my throat. No, instead I just have to have violent coughing fits that sound like the lovechild of puking and death.

But seriously, I feel pretty darn good. :] Or at least I think I do. I dunno, maybe I'm just used to being sick and once the trees stop blooming I'll be like OH HOLY CRAP I FEEL BEYOND AWESOME!!! Because there won't be pollen to perplex, pester, and torture my sinuses. The trees are out to kill me, I know it. It's because I haven't been recycling, isn't it? (Not my fault! Out apartment complex has NO bins! poo)

Random fact: I learned this week that, as a natural redhead, not only am I more susceptible to skin cancer, but I also feel pain more vividly than other hair colors and I need more anesthesia to knock me out . .. which explains why I woke up in the middle of having my wisdom teeth removed.
With great hair comes great responsibility.


I just realized I have written two posts about illnesses back to back after a long pause of . . . nothing.
I'm alive, really.
And my next post I won't mention snot at all.
Promise :]

1 comment:

  1. Oh my gosh! I can't believe you woke up during surgery--how horrifying!

    ReplyDelete

Good morning, Starshine! The Earth says, "Hello!"