Facebookin'

Peeps, one day I decided to follow a trend and make a Facebook profile for my blog.

I'm going to apologize in advance: the only thing that posts there are automatic updates on blog posts.

Basically, that new posts now exist.

Because I never log on and do much else to it. Because I forget. 

And blah. 

I don't link every blog post to my personal FB because well ..... I don't know. I feel like they're two separate entities. Most people I know personally don't read my stuff, and that's okay. Maybe even preferable. Oh, I'll link a post on occasion, and there's always a link in my ABOUT page, but only a handful of close friends, a family friend or two, and my mom read (HULLOOO MUMSIE!!!)

And I'm okay with that. 

It's almost more private that way .... Which is just weird because the blog's open to the whole flippin' Internet. 

What a weird concept. 

However, my personal posts on FB are WAY more frequent than my blog FB posts and, in their own way, a little bit funny. 

Or way more funny, since a little funny is loads more than no funny at all.

In response to a photo advert for Audible's "Fifty Shades of Grey."

So there you have it people: my life according to the facebooking interwebs.

We should be FB friends now, right? ;)

So much and nothing at all

I have absolutely nothing to say.

No, really, just nadda.

Well, I guess I have SOMETHING to say. In the last twenty-four hours, I have written THREE full blog posts, and, in the end, decided they just weren't worthy to post.

I wrote about a minor medical abnormality my doctor discovered.
I thought it was fascinating, but then I was all, "Wait a second . . . you're not supposed to write crap like this for the entire flippin internet, are you?"
So I saved it as a draft and I left it alone.
YOU WILL NEVER KNOW THE HARMLESS ODDITY INSIDE ME. NEVER!!!
Now I'll just let the curiosity of THAT stew for a little while . . . if you beg me, I might tell you. Maybe.
But it's probably underwhelming, anyways . . . . Meh.

[source]

 I tried to come up with a list of random facts about myself--those lists that are so popular--but, doggone it, the only thing I could come up with was the fact that my husband and I resemble our cats and this meme--also cat related.

[source]

Then I wrote an ENTIRE post on why I think I like cats.

Think about it, people.
WHY I LIKE CATS.

NO ONE CARES IF I LIKE CATS OR WHY THE CRAP I DO.

 I don't even know if I care. I like cats. I think it's weird if you don't.

[source]

^^^^THIS.
This is my reaction when people just plain hate cats.
And desserts.
HOW DO YOU NOT LOVE DESSERTS?!
Even if they're like the super healthy, green, "it's just a pretty spinach leaf" dessert. Desserts are awesome. That's why they're saved for last.
Because you want to end your meal on the best note possible and what note could possibly be better than cake?! Cookies?? Pie??? Ice cream?!? What could be better?
NOTHING.

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Anyone who tells you differently is lying to you.

[source]

And those are all the memes and gifs I can muster for today . . . I just realized this is my first meme-heavy post. I don't know whether to feel proud or ashamed of myself . . . Hm.

Oh, and this one, because it so describes my life at the moment . . .

[source]

P.S. If you know who he is, we are automatically friends.  Not even kidding.

Netflix Wins: North & South, Mushi-shi, Frasier, and The Life of Mammals

I've decided that I should try to put all my time in front of the TV to good use. Kind of. Maybe?
You see, I know how frustrating it is when you finish a decent series on Netflix and you just don't know where to go next. I watch a little bit of everything, so, hopefully, as I review four of my new favorites, I can help give you some new viewing ideas.
And, in return, you tell me some of yours! Yay for movies and series!!!

For this installment we have:

North & South

I'm a sucker for BBC mini series. Really, I am.
I opened up North and South not knowing what to expect. I was HOOKED.  It's a four-part series about the Hale family who moves from their pleasant parsonage in Southern England to the industrial North.  Within two minutes of meeting factory owner John Thorton, passionate Margaret Hale has decided she hates him. And, folks, it is ON.
She thinks he's harsh and heartless. He thinks she's arrogant and without a clue. And, wouldn't you know it, that's not the case AT ALL.
Ok, so this review makes it sound like any shallow romance. It's NOT.  There's great depth to the characters and the issues of social justice and welfare in the time period. Basically it's Pride and Prejudice with a cause. You see the issues of the upper class, the plight of the lower class, and how they all fit together. The growth in both Margaret and John is really well done, transforming the characters slowly and believable through a shared series of events. You pretty much know where this story is going, but the suspense is great. I couldn't wait to turn on the next episode to see how it all played out.
And Richard Armitage, people? Oh my goodness. More please.
The whole cast is fantastic, but RICHARD ARMITAGE. Brooding has never been so sexy.
If you enjoy period pieces, Victorian Britain, and anything resembling Jane Austen, turn this on and enjoy. I adored every second of it.
Now I just have to find the book!

Mushi-Shi
I confess: I love anime. I just do. I find some of the most creative and well-written stories hidden within Japanese animation. It's a wonderful escape and a feast for the imagination.
Mushi-Shi is a collection of short stories surrounding invisible creatures between flora and fauna--"mushi"--that are tied to all life. The entire series feels like an anthology of ancient folk tales attempting explain problems and illnesses by attributing them to these bizarre creatures.  
Ginko is a "mushi master" traveling historical Japan, searching for exotic mushi and aiding those who find themselves pestered or plagued by the spirit creatures.  Sometimes the stories are happy little vignettes, others not even remotely. It's hard to tell how each episode will end.
It's a beautiful mood piece--the music and artwork are simple but wonderfully fitted to each scene and emotion. Sadly, Netflix only carries the English dub, but it's not too bad.  I look past English dubs WAY more easily than the hubs does--he won't watch anime unless it's in Japanese.
Considering how short each episode is, I thought the characters were pretty well developed. Their feelings and decisions make SENSE in a world that is both fantastical in concept and gritty in its reality.  You feel for their struggles.
If you want an escape into a realm of fantasy, I highly recommend Mushi-shi.  At twenty-six episodes only twenty minutes long, it's not a terribly long watch, but it's worth it.

Frasier
Julie used to tell me how she would sneak into Chris's room late at night to watch Frasier with him. Chris continued to recommend it, so FINALLY I checked it out.
It was worth it.
At some point, I will learn that Chris is almost always right.
Almost.
You know, I tried really hard to come up with a time when he wasn't right and I couldn't think of one. But I'm sticking with "almost" anyways.
Frasier Crane is a successful radio psychiatrist dishing out advice to the citizens of Seattle despite the fact that his life is kind of falling apart. He's newly divorced, his widowed father just moved in, and his married brother has a crush on their physical therapist. Plus, his dad's dog won't stop staring at him.
I love the juxtaposition between Martin--Frasier's tough and practical ex-cop dad--and his two sons who would rather discuss fine art and opera than watch a football game. Beer is out of the question--Cabernet Sauvignon is far superior--and, if you must partake, PLEASE use a coaster.
The dialogue is witty, and the characters are hysterical but entirely human.  Good writing and humor is never goes out of style . . . even if Frasier's mullet in the first seasons drove me batty. Thank goodness some hairstyles die and never come back.
If you're looking for some laughs with a sprinkling of sophistication, check out Frasier.  It never fails to put a smile on my face

David Attenborough's The Life of Mammals
I ADORE documentaries, especially nature documentaries, and ESPECIALLY nature documentaries by David Attenborough. Something about his voice . . . I don't know if the documentaries are just plain BETTER than others or if his pleasant voice only makes it seem that way. Either way, he's a winner.
The Life of Mammals involves ten episodes categorized by the different feeding habits or habitat of a mammal group (insect hunters, plant predators, opportunists, etc.)
Each one is filled with stunning photography and just heaps of information all delivered conversationally by Sir Attenborough. It's almost as if we were only discussing the mating habits of hedgehogs over tea instead of viewing an educational program. 
What, YOU don't talk about lions, bats, whales, and hedgehogs over tea and biscuits? How astounding.
No really, I laughed out-loud at the hedgehog scene. Because, um . . . SEX. I'm a twelve-year-old boy sometimes, I swear. (and um, on that note, these documentaries aren't shy at all about that whole mating thing . . . just in case you were considering putting little kids in front of the screen. Animals hunt, kill and mate. Circle of life and all that jazz).
ANYWAYS.
 I loved this series. Every minute of it. I have learned that if a documentary has David Attenborough's name on it, you've discovered a real gem. 


And those are four of my top choices (there are SO many that I love, but I thought I'd start with a handful of more obscure ones and maybe work my way into the more popular titles).

What are some of your favorite Netflix picks?

August Edition of Literary Junkies

  I've never done this link up before and am eager to give it a try! Books are fabulous and bookish people even more so! Here we go!

 1. What are you currently reading? Tell us about it!
I'm actually working on two at the moment--one for day time reading and one for before bed.

During the day, I'm working on All the Pretty Horses by Cormac McCarthy.
I fell in love with McCarthy when I read The Road three years ago, so I thought I'd try one of his older works. McCarthy is definitely a man's author--there's little description of emotion, appearances, or locations, you know all the stuff that matters to a woman. Instead, he describes the things important to our young, male protagonist: the smell of horses, the way a woman's hair falls across her back, the landscape, what he ate for dinner--these things. It's jarring at first, being thrown into a story with no explanation, but that's part of its brilliance. I'm loving this story of the misadventures of a runaway as he rides from Texas to Mexico then finds ways to survive. There's even a little bit of a love story. I can't wait to finish it! 

 My nighttime reading is Notes from the Tilt-A-Whirl by N.D. Wilson. 
I don't know how to categorize this book: it's not fiction, but it's not really nonfiction, either. It's not self-help or even strictly religious. It's more . . . reflective? Wilson has written his thoughts on the miracles in the tiniest pieces of life, found beauty in what we often find the most insignificant, and then uses that to put the human life in perspective.  It's touching, thoughtful, challenging, funny, and, honestly, quite beautiful.  How would you live if you realized nothing was too small or meaningless? That there's beauty and adventure in the tiniest things?   

2. What is one book you think every person should read at least once in their life? Why?
 Hmmm . . . I honestly don't know . . . there are so many good ones . . . I think . . . Maybe . . . It's a tie between The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman, The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis, and To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee.  All three of them, in some way, have challenged the way I look at life and people. Plus, they're just wonderful books.

 3. Do you think you could ever write a book? If so what genre would it be?
When I was 12, I started writing a book. I wrote and edited it until I was sixteen. I still toy with it and plan to rewrite it, perfect it, if you will. To be honest, I hate the idea of failing it--failing to write well, failing to tell the story, to pull it all together. It was a fantasy. If I ever really do rewrite it, it will still be a fantasy :]

4. Do you listen to audiobooks? Do you look for the same things in an audiobook that you do in one you'll read?
I LOVE audio books! Two of my favorites to listen to have been The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi (GREAT mystery) and A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket (Hilarious! And read by Tim Curry! Huzzah). 
In both audio and print books, I look for good writing, great characters, and an engaging story. For specifically audio, however, I HAVE to have an awesome narrator. If the person reading the book does a lousy job, it draws you out of the story and all you can focus on is how grating the voice is.  For instance, once, during a road trip, my family tried to listen to The Trumpeter Swan by E.B. White, read by E.B. White. Oh dear me . . . The man can write, but he can't narrate at ALL. We had to turn the story off before the first chapter. 

5. Can you suggest a book of each type for others to try:
Fantasy: Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
Nonfiction: Killing Lincoln by Bill O'Reilly and Martin Dugard
Fiction: The Diary of Adam and Eve by Mark Twain
Romance: I'm not really a romance reader . . . at all . . . does that make me less of a woman? But, I suppose The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern would count--there's a definite love story there, even if it takes you half a book to reach it. Plus it's a great read. 
Classics: The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo
Young Adult: A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle

Book Reviews

Neverwhere
Neil Gaiman
This lovely little adventure tale introduced me to the mastermind that is Neil Gaiman.  I'm only mildly obsessed with the man. To say he's on of my modern literary idols would be completely accurate (don't get me started). If I could trade lives with anyone for a day, I would trade with Neil Gaiman . . . but that's another post for another time.

Neverwhere is the story of Richard Mayhew, a very nice but average sort of fellow living an average sort of life in London.  One night, on his way dinner with his fiance, Richard stumbles upon a homeless girl bleeding to death on the street. From that point on, everything in Richard's life unravels.  He finds himself on a quest in an alternate reality: London Below, a fascinating re-imagining of  London's Underground. The characters are wonderfully rendered in this dark, gritty, Alice-in-Wonderland-esque tale.  This was a story that enchanted and terrified me in its first reading, and did so again when I reread it five years later.  Would I ever want to visit London Below? Hmm . . . I'll have to get back to you on that one. Would I reread the Marquis de Carabas, Hunter, Door, and Richard's adventures  again and again? In a HEARTBEAT. 

If you love dark humor/dark fantasy, check Gaiman out. Don't question, just do it. He's a freakin' master.

 Killing Lincoln

Bill O'Reilly and Martin Dugard

There seems to be a recent, massive spark in curiosity about one of America's greatest presidents. I'd like to think it all began with the publication of Seth Grahame-Smith's Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (really fun and educational read, by the way--I HIGHLY recommend it to parody lovers), but, then again, great men are always fascinating.

Killing Lincoln covers the final days of the Civil Wat leading to Lee's surrender, John Wilkes Booth's vengeful obsession, that fateful trip to the theater, and ends with Booth's demise.  All the while, the authors tie together the plans, theories, and conspiracies leading to America's first presidential assassination. The research is very detailed without being too bogged down and doesn't read like a history book.  Is it the most thrilling thing I've ever read? Well, I wasn't exactly sweating, but I found myself wanting to keep reading and, quite frankly, enjoying myself. For anyone who paid attention in third grade American history, we all know how the story goes, but all the details O'Reilly and Dugard have managed to collect and relate in everyday language is really interesting.  If you like history, it's definitely worth picking up.



Til We Have Faces: A Myth Retold
C.S. Lewis  

I would have to put this book down as one of my all time favorites.  When I was a junior in high school, a sophomore lent me the book, saying, "I know how much you love Lewis, and this is my favorite. You HAVE to read it. It's a little slow in the beginning, but it's worth it."
I devoured it.
I mean, really, started reading it in the car after school and didn't stop until I had finished it that evening, much to my best friend's dismay, as our sleepover became a watching-Sarah-read fest. (Yes, it was rude, and, yes, I am sorry, but . . . the book was AMAZING).
When I said earlier that Gaiman is one of my modern literary idols, Lewis tops him, which says A  LOT. You have no idea.

The book is a re-imagining of the Greek myth of Cupid and Psyche. The story is told by Psyche's older, ugly sister, Orual, who composes the tale as a case against the gods. The girls grow up in harsh, barbaric kingdom that worships the blood-thirsty Ungit, an incarnation of Aphrodite. When famine and disease plague the land, Psyche is sent as a sacrifice to the God of the Mountain, breaking Orual's heart as she loves her little sister more than life itself. It's a beautiful, raw story that studies and reveals the layers of the human heart.

As a lover of Greek mythology, I adored this retelling--it remains true to the original tale while offering a new voice and vision.  It's a story of selfish love vs sacrificial love, identity, and fate. Lewis did a remarkable job writing in  female voice, making Orual a truly believable character as she observes, struggles, and grows from an intelligent, frightened child to noble, warrior queen. Every time I reread it, I walk away with some new revelation.  Is it a fast-paced, action-packed story with tons of romance? Meh, maybe not by most standards, but it's a fabulous story.  

Things You Probably Don't Need to Know . . .

First off,  I have a confession: I have found myself on the internet . . . All my awkwardness and insecurities and nerdities displayed in one character: Cyd Sherman aka Codex from The Guild.  Every time she stares into her webcam and stammers a confession of her own social anxieties, I'm like "Oh my GOSH! ME, TOO!!!" Forget that she's a fictional character, Codex gets it. I bet she obsessively rubs her hands together whenever she's nervous, too . . . or maybe that's just me . . .

[source]

If someone were to ever make a movie of my life (you know if it suddenly gets thrilling or heartbreaking or something), I would beg Felicia Day to play the part. I mean BEG BEG. Because I adore her. I just do.

More confessions . . . .

• I love peanut butter like most women love chocolate. Like I can't live without it. I take on chocolate chip cookies, baked into cookies, on bananas, apples, graham crackers, as pie . . . I definitely go through phases where I don't touch it for weeks, but I kind of need it in my larder AT ALL TIMES. Just in case.

I don't know why I'm writing about food . . . I'm not hungry . . . maybe I am? I don't know.

• Some of my worst nightmares involve my teeth falling out.
  
• Willow and Oz from "Buffy: the Vampire Slayer" are one of my all-time FAVORITE TV couples, mostly because of Oz, I think. His dry wit is so . . . just . . . love it. Couldn't resist it if I tried, even if he is short . . . and a werewolf . . . Oh, minor details, am I right?

From this moment, I was hooked.
I don't care how "has-been" Buffy is, I  NEED a Team Oz shirt. Not even kidding. 

•  I still have my rock collection that I started when I was ten. Trading rocks and sea shells was the only time I was comfortable haggling, and, even then, I felt guilty afterwards because I was pretty sure I'd swindled my friend.
• I want to learn to crochet mainly because I want to make scarves . . . mostly Harry Potter Hogwarts House-themed scarves . . . Go Ravenclaw! (Alas, my nerdhood abounds . . . )
• I am HORRIFICALLY near-sighted. Things get blurry if they're six inches away from my nose. I need laser-eye surgery or I'll probably be legally blind by 50.
• In social situations with strangers, I drink copious amounts of water because I feel like my mouth needs to do something but I'm too nervous to make it speak. I'm best hydrated when anxious, apparently.
• Despite this, I really enjoy public speaking, performing on stage, meeting new people, and going to parties.
• I didn't start painting until I was in college because I was afraid I couldn't do it. Up until that point, my only artistic experience was sketching with pencils. When my freshman roommate introduced me to other mediums, I fell in love and became an art minor (I'm not nearly talented enough to be an art MAJOR--I just like to dabble). 

I've only let Chris hang up one of my paintings: this one little experiment called Heaven and Earth that I created right before our wedding. My parents driveway still has paint spots on it . . .
The photographs are of Chris and his best pal, Joe, being all musical and were taken by Joe's sister, Amy

•   My favorite painting was one I did to piss off my art teacher.  We were supposed to do a painting in values (grays, whites, and blacks) using basic, angular shapes. I didn't understand the assignment, so I did it in my dorm room the night before.  Turns out, it was an in-class project, my painting didn't fit the criteria, and, instead of letting me grab a new canvas (or give me a canvas sheet as he had other students) the man made me paint over it. HE DEMANDED I KILL MY BRAIN CHILD. MURDER!!! So, enraged and heartbroken, I did just that.  The new shades of gray painting featured little dolls with faces like The Scream playing on this giant, box-shaped, toy tiger with gaping jaws. I called it Preyground. I think my teacher thought I was deranged. Apparently, someone liked it because it was stolen from the art room. I've never gotten over that.
  P.S. Can you tell I'm incredibly passive aggressive? Maybe?
• I'm a night owl in the worst kind of way. I also love owls in the best kind of way. Just adore them. I think that must be why they're kind of the theme of my new living room . . .
• I've traveled to Nicaragua, Tokyo, China, the Bahamas, and Great Britain. Spending a semester in London was one of the best decisions I ever made. I miss it almost every day.
  There are still so many new places I need to see before I die . . .
• I have absolutely NO sense of direction. At all. I'm constantly having to check my hands for my wedding rings to remember which way is left.

• All our pet's names are references to something nerdish--"Navi" is the fairy from the video game, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time; "Pipkin" is one of my favorite characters from Watership Down; and "Shasta," along with being Chris's favorite soda, is a character from Chris's favorite Chronicles of Narnia book, The Horse and His Boy.

Have I said too much? Sometimes, I worry that I do . . .  But, anyways, just little random things about me . . . Thanks for reading! You're a champ!

Sometimes, you come back to the same old thing

You know, I will spend hours--nay DAYS--tweaking my blog design, and, when I pull it up for my husband and siblings to admire, they look puzzled. "Isn't that they same thing you had last time?"

"No! ... I mean, yeah the background's the same, but I change the font and the header and the layout here and--" I stop talking because their eyes have glazed over in an attempt to sound interested.

"Oh, well, it looks good." Then they walk off.

So I TRY to do things differently. I went all blank and white and sleek and minimalist like all these awesome blogs do, and it just seemed . . . empty . . . so I try a few new things, learn a few new tricks, and it still just didn't feel right. So then I try a new background, and it seems too busy and then--doggone it--the editor freezes and won't let me change a darn thing for two days.

• FYI -- if the blogger editor every does that to you, save your layout as text in a document (go to TEMPLATE and click EDIT HTML and it brings up a text box), then go back to the TEMPLATE editor and go to a default layout.  It should clear things up. If you just had a minor change to your layout, just plug your saved code back into the EDIT HTML box and then tweak what you need to in the template editor. Or start from scratch, it's your call. 

 I spend forever editing this image, trying to get it the way I'd like . . . but it just didn't seem to work . . . it was too . . . busy  . . . despite being awesome and involving squid, one of my favorite animals . . .

If you think this one looks better . . . let me know . . . I'm quite attached but just not sure it fits . . . plus it took me FOREVER to get the image edited correctly . . .

So, in the end, I tweak and I edit and I search and I plug stuff in and I edit some more and I alter more text and more images in PIXLR (seriously, it's my new favorite online photo editor--LOVE IT). Finally, I look through all the art and pictures and I come back to this one:

And, doggone it . . . it just fits . . .

So, the blog has been evolving in appearance for a month, now . . . . and it looks almost exactly like before . . .  *sigh . . . Well, if it's not broken, don't fix it, right?

Oh, I'm thinking about starting a 30 Day Link-Up with some writing and/or photo prompts.  Thoughts?  I'm considering some sort of "get to know you" prompts. When Chris and I first started dating, we'd exchange emails with all sorts of wacky questions like "if you could create a planet, what would it be?" or "What color would you be and why?" It was loads of fun, and I thought it would be a great way to get to know some more bloggers and help with writers block.
I'd love to get your opinions! Throw them at me!

I have great big news . . . lots of it . . . but I'm saving that for the next post or two, which will hopefully be up right after Christmas :]

Have a wonderful holiday, everyone! Merry Christmas!

In which I nerdishly rave about one of my all-time favorite books EVER!

In true nerdish fashion, we have tickets to the midnight premier of The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.  I’m ridiculously excited.  I didn’t do midnight premieres for any of the LOTR films, so this thing—this is huge.  Everyone has SOME book they’d love to see turned into a movie, but this book literally changed my life.  

I remember, as a little kid, dusting my parents’ bookshelves and coming across this large, beautiful, green book with a dragon on the cover.  He was red, with one golden eye glaring out at the world, smoke curling from his nostrils, as he clutched at the mound of gold that was his bed.  I wasn’t allowed to watch movies or read books with magic or dragons, so I would stare at it in wonder before putting it back, wondering why my parents had something “evil” in their bedroom.

(source)
Illustration by Michael Hague

Week after week, I dusted, eying the strange book, until finally I pulled it off the shelf and, stealthily, began turning the pages.  Inside were the most beautiful illustrations of a small man with curly hair and stocky fellows with beards. They carried swords, fought wicked goblins, talked with a pale, shriveled thing in caves, soared on eagle wings, wrestled giant spiders, and, finally encountered the great dragon.
I was in awe.
I’d read little snippets, trying to understand the pictures (especially the one of the skinny creature with giant eyes in the cave), then shove the book back on the shelf, terrified of getting caught, wondering if it really was a very bad book. 

(source)
Illustration by Michael Hague

The secret picture-gazings became a habit; until, finally, I took the book off the shelf, put it under my arm and carried it away.  I was going to read it, dagnabbit, and no one would stop me.    

I swept away in a world that I knew, then, had always been calling to my heart.  It had sung to me from that dusty bookshelf, forgotten.  Sometimes, you find words that unlock something inside you, something secret even to you.

(source)
Illustration by Michael Hague

I’ve read it maybe a dozen times since that first time, thirteen years ago.  I have taken it with me everywhere, like a security blanket, and it has been present for so many life changes.  After my family moved, I sat down on my frameless mattress that was my bed for a week, and I read the book through in a matter of hours, finding comfort in the familiar.  A paperback version traveled with me to Nicaragua, and was lost somehow on the bus taking us home from Miami, after I proved I knew the book so well I could read it upside down. I took my beloved green hardback to college then to London, despite the luggage weight limit—I just couldn’t imagine going to its birthplace without it, without the guarantee that I had something brilliant to read when I was lonely. Finally, I took it out of my parents’ house into my own when I was married.  

(source)
Illustration by Michael Hague

 Technically, it’s not “mine.”  It was a Christmas present from my mom to my dad during their early married years.  She thought he had read it, and bought it for him hoping to read it with him.  This is an incredibly sweet offer from my mother, who, until this past year, is such a realist she couldn’t get past the third sentence, in which the hobbit’s glorious, round green door is introduced.  “There aren’t round doors,” she said. “He’s a little person who lives in a hole. No one does that. I just can’t, Sarah. I can’t.”  As it turns out, my father had never read it, and, really, has shown no real interest in reading it, though I get my love for the imaginary from him. I think the LOTR movies’ Ringwraiths put a bad taste in his mouth.

Still, I see it as part of my inheritance. I was the first to read it, after all.  I read it aloud to my little sister at bedtime when she was six.  I will never forget how she ran from her room to my mom’s, begging for a later bedtime so I could read the last chapter to her, then darting across the house, squealing, “SHE SAID YEEES!!!”  I passed it on to my brother, and, from that point on, we were true nerds together, in love with Star Wars and Tolkien.  It led me to one of my great heroes, John Ronald Reuel Tolkien, the father of the modern fantasy epic, who has so hugely influenced my own writing and creativity. 

One day, I hope to read it to my children—to laugh with them as the dwarves demolish Biblo’s kitchen, to shudder at Gollum’s riddles, to feel the fear, the curiosity, the wonder, the tragedy, and the victory of one small man’s journey from a predictable dud to a wielder of swords and riddles, a legendary hero who changed the world.

I know that there are “greater” books—books upheld by literary scholars, by people far smarter than I am—but this has earned a very special place on my shelf and in my heart.  It opened the world of fantasy for me.  We met in secret, and we fell in love.  “In a whole in the ground, there lived a hobbit,” and the world grew a little bigger, a little brighter.

(source)

So, yeah, I'm a little excited.
Just a tiny bit.
And I'm a nerd in love with a book. Yeah . . . . just a tad . . . but, to be fair, I'm in love with lots of books . . . they're just not midnight premiers tomorrow ;]

Tweeny Note in Honor of the Closing of the "Saga"

Dear Female Tweens of Today:

In honor of the release of the final piece of the unexplainable cultural phenomenon of the past seven years (good grief, that long?!), I'm going to finally speak my mind (though the fellows of Rifftrax do it SO much better--seriously, I DIED).

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I had time to reflect upon my own high school experiences, whether they matched up to dear so-not-dysfunctional-and-bland Bella and Edward's (No, I'm not being sarcastic . . . really . . . you don't believe me? Well, shucks.). Mine didn't. Not even a little. So here, dear tweens (and teens . . . and grown-ups . . .), are my words of advice.

• Your parents may not be quite as oblivious as dear Charlie Swan. In fact, they will probably know you're hiding your boyfriend in your bedroom. And they won't like it. No sir. And you can totally forget about sneaking off to Italy . . . randomly. Yeah, it's not gonna happen. And if Charlie Swan is your parents' idea of a great role model, please find yourself a new set.
• Throwing yourself off a cliff will not bring your boyfriend back. Sorry.
• If you notice some guy glaring at you from across the cafeteria consistently . . . and not like day-dreaming-into-space-and-you-happen-to-be-in-the-way or check-me-out-wink staring, but the "I'm a creeper and thinking nasty, dirty things" staring, RUN. He is not a knight in shining armor. He is, truly, a creeper thinking nasty, dirty things. You can judge a book by it's cover.
• Also, if he suddenly appears outside your window or inside your bedroom at night, don't swoon over the romantic nature. That's called "stalking" and it's bad. So, in response YOU SCREAM. Then kick him, call the police, and send his skinny creeper tookus to the slammer.

^^^The appropriate response
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• If you find yourself miserable, confused, and obsessive in the relationship, it's probably not helping you out. I don't care how hot the guy is or how fast he runs up a mountain or scales pine trees, he's not good for you. 
• If your friends keep asking you to do things, participate. Don't sit there like a wall ornament and mope. If all you do is pout and pine, you're not fun to be with, and, eventually, people will stop including you. Unless, that is, you live in the alternative universe of the Lady Meyers, in which the sulk-mistress who obsesses over her boyfriend  is still the most sought-after chick in the entire school.

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• If someone keeps telling you to go away, GO AWAY. If he wants you, he will chase you. If he tells you to leave and you keep following him around, it's a mess. Trust me. Been there, done that, so much unnecessary tension and drama. Turned out he was gay. You never know, ladies. You just never know. 
• Abstinence is completely and totally worth the wait (I speak from experience, peeps--so awesome) . . . but,  if your lover is like "I can't sleep with you because I'll kill you." Uuuuuh . . . . wait . . . huh??? That's not love and patience that's . . . well . . . I don't even know. Fear? No meaning. No depth. And, fyi, if someone says that, you RUN (are you sensing a theme?)
• HONEYMOONS SHOULD NEVER BE SPENT JUST PLAYING CHESS. Period. I mean, really.
• Oh, and P.S. Vampires don't sparkle. The end. That's like taking Rambo's bow and arrow away or stripping Schwartzenegger of his muscles. You just don't. These are viscious undead killing machines . . . let's throw glitter on them! YAY!!!! 
  Yeah, NO. -_-

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And I'm hopping off my soap box.
I hope I didn't offend anyone. If you are willing to explain to me the glories of Twilight, please do. I tend to be behind on the times and confused by trends of pop culture. I just don't see it folks. I tried to see it. I really did. I read all four books, even, because people kept telling me they got better . . . and they didn't . . . I can see why they're entertaining and why people like them (they fulfill the fantasy of the all-man--depending on your definition of manhood--seeking after you), but I've never been a romance fan. Not that kind of romance anyways. 

Some people might call me a "hater" but I don't have an issue with the fans. I have an issue with crummy literature that gives young women the wrong impression of what a healthy relationship looks like. I have no beef with you if you enjoy Meyer's quartet (I have several friends who do), but it's just not my thing.  I can have an opinion, right? Maybe just a little one? Please?

That being said, I leave you with the video that has brought me oh so much joy

Cheerio!

A Collection of Random Ramblings . . .

Because, you see, I can't think straight any more. Thoughts dark in an out of my head like flashing strobe lights, and I just have trouble forming coherent sentences any more. The hubs blames the cubicle. I'm inclined to agree.

ANYWAYS . . . .

1.       I actually get really, REALLY cranky when I’m hungry.  I didn’t realize how bad it was before until I went through a werewolf transformation this weekend. . .
Before Dinner: SARAH BEEAAAST!!!! HULK SMASH!!!! ALL LIFE MEANINGLESS!!!! ALL NOISE MUST STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!! GRAAAAAAAAGH!!!!
After Dinner: By Jove, what a spectacular evening we’re having! How on earth did all my dishes break? Oh well, no matter. Did you know I love you? Because I do, ole chap! You’re a dandy! Now, where are little furry creatures so I might snuggle them to bits?!
And, yes, I TOTALLY sound like a pompous English gentlemen.
Exactly, in fact.
Or not at all.



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2.       I think my puppy is a hussy.
Not even kidding . . . even though all her lady bits were removed . . .
Here's the thing: she absolutely does everything in her power to turn all of the hubs' attentino from me to herself.
For example: Chris and I are watching TV. I need a drink, so I stand up and walk to the kitchen, not ten feet away. I turn around, and my dog is IN MY SPOT lounging all over MY husband, all “Paint me like one of your French girls! . . . and while you’re at it, scratch my belly.”
While making eye contact with me all, “Is this your seat? Too bad!”

Shameless little floozy.
This means war, you know. And I bloody feed you.

If it had only happened once, it would be funny, but this sort of thing happens multiple times every day.  The only good side to this is that she snuggles with me just as much . . . but Chris has always been her favorite . . . which is an issue because he’s my favorite, too . . . and, when he’s home, all of his attention belongs to ME, get it, canine?

Yes, I am totally aware that I am jealous of a dog . . . and that it’s ridiculous . . . but, seriously . . . .

 

3.       “Pretty Little Liars” irritates me beyond reason . . . but I cannot pull my eyes away.  It’s like a super bad train wreck . . . with a nuclear explosion . . . of high fashion and pretty men . . . and I can’t stop staring.
The whole Ezra/Aria thing weirds me out (actually, the whole re-occuring theme/situations of older guy/younger girl) . . . I have nothing against major age gaps (my parents are nine years apart, and that’s totally cool), I do have an issue with a 26 year-old unwaveringly wooing a dramatic, insecure 16 year old. I don’t find it cute. I don’t find him charming. I find him whipped and desperate. Aria’s just an irritating snob.  BUT DON’T LET ANYTHING COME BETWEEN THEIR LOOOOOVE!!!!!  
Also, I’ve never known ANY high school chick to dress like these girls . . . oh, yeah, and in completely different outfits EVERY. DAY. I know realism wasn’t exactly our goal, but COME ON.

In a final note, I do not understand a show about Queen Bees is so addicting . . . These girls are the embodiment of everything I can’t stand, and, here I am,  cheering them on. Why am I rooting for them? WHY?!?!?!

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4.       I have a thing for nerds. Like bad.
Old news, right? See, I didn’t realize HOW much of a thing I had for nerds until I saw the new Bond film (which you totally need to see like right now).  Here I am, enjoying the witty and oh-so-debonair exploit of Bond, James Bond, and then this slight little fellow with glasses pops on screen and starts discussing art . . . .  
I no longer saw the muscular, fierce Daniel Craig.
I saw Ben Whishaw and ONLY Ben Whishaw.
Oh, gee and golly.
If I had to choose between Mr. Bond and this young new Q, I’d pick Q ten times.
And then I’d raid his closet because, my gosh, the sweaters!
I don’t know what this says about me . . . .  

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Maybe it's because he kind of resembles the hubs . . . I've always had a weakness for nerds with floppy dark hair . . .

And those are all the significant thoughts my mind can formulate . . . and that "I like turtles" . . . name that internet reference :]

Too-da-loo!

Nerdish Outbursts

First off, thank you SO MUCH all you lovely ladies who commented with great encouragement on my last post.  It really brightened my day and helped put on a new perspective.  Life's a journey, and it can only be a great one with a few detours and bumps on the road, right? Thank you so, so much! You're awesome!

And, now, on with the blog . . .

Some days, life is pretty slow. 

When you’re a cubicle minion oft forgotten, it’s REALLY slow . . . but that’s ok because I like slow, and, really, I now know about 300 different ways to prepare chicken and spray paint the living daylights out of any and all inanimate objects—thank you, Pinterest.

Then, you stop, and go, huh, maybe it’s not so slow . . . or maybe it is and the little things get that much cooler.

Friday featured the first time since Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (don’t judge—that movie was epic, Avengers worthy even, I’m not even kidding) that I chilled with the “English Department.” I might not be currently employed as one, but I will always be an English teacher, and my other literary pals totally get it.  Once you’re in, you’re in.  Your brain never quite gets out of that education-book-lover-must-love-and-share-all-the-literary-goodness mode.

Shelly, Jessica, and I all decked-out in Who shirts for the premiere . . . thanks, Jess, for the picture!

Oh, and we’re all Harry Potter, Tolkien, Lewis, Star Wars, superhero, and Dr. Who nerds. WORD. (That’s right, I said “WORD”).  We actually gathered, their hubs and kiddo included, to watch BBC America’s premiere of the new Dr. Who season.

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Holy freakin’ crap from heaven.

If you’re not on the Dr. Who fan train, I don’t know how . . . I just don’t.  The hubs shrugs and says, “I COULD like it—I mean, what I’ve seen is ok—but I’m just not going to invest the time in it right now.”
As far as I’m concerned, the man doesn’t have a choice. Not really.  I’ve won him over to Supernatural, Firefly, and LOST, I WILL bring him to the Who Side.
AND IT WILL BE TIME WELL-INVESTED, KID.

Anyways, highlight of the evening, being asked, “So, where are you and Chris going to be living again?”
“Well, he’ll be working in Salinas—“
And everyone in the room simultaneously burst out, “OOOH!!! STEINBECK!!!”
Are we book nerds or are we book nerds?

Speaking of nerds, I have to say that Guild Wars 2 is pretty much living up to all the hype. I’ve waited four years for this sucker to hatch onto the interwebs, and, now, here it is in all its pixelated glory. 

Yeah, I'm kind of loving the Sylvari Ranger . . . Such a super nerd . . .
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Sure, like any game, it has its downsides, but I’m loving it. In fact, I’ll probably never touch WoW again, sorry, Chris . . . though they will have Kung Fu Pandas in a month . . . seriously, kung-fu-fighting bloody pandas . . . who ride turtles . . .
I have been a nerd for far too long because think that this is just too cool.  I mean, seriously, it’s a PANDA on a TURTLE!!! How can this not be AWESOME?!?!
Still . . . I’ll let Chris have that one and I’ll just watch.  WoW is just too repetitive for me—it feels like a variety of random acts of violence with little to no plot. I know there’s a plot . . . but I can’t find it, so I’m kind of “meh” with it.

Chris sent me this pic . . . he swears that the "Gamer Girl" looks EXACTLY like me when I'm playing--coloring, expression, hair, the works--I'm simultaneously flattered and kind of bewildered . . . mostly because I only play after showering, geeze . . . dinner may take a backseat, but I'm gonna save Hyrule clean, thank you very much . . . now that I think about it, I'm not sure that that's much better . . .
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Could I be any more of a nerd? Why, YES, I could. For Labor Day, the hubs and I spent the day watching the ORIGINAL Special Edition (the ONLY edition, really) on VHS (we're THAT hardcore--Blu-Ray Lucas edits? Gimme a break, LAME) Star Wars Trilogy and eating Han-Burgers while drinking Yoda Soda. Are you embarrassed for me yet?

So that’s my nerd-overload. 
If you can still stand me, props to you, I'll be normal again this weekend when there are no more premieres or time to revel in sci-fi masterpieces.

It’s been a fun week as something new has come up--no house yet, but life continues to develop.   More to share later!

And, no, it's not a baby.
Why do I feel like I have to clarify that?