Friday's Letters

Dear Zulu:
It’s been fun puppysitting you while your owners are on vacation.
No, they didn’t abandon you—they’ll be back in about three days.  No, we are not your new home, and NO, THE CATS ARE NOT OVERSIZED SQUIRRELS. STOP TRYING TO EAT THEM.
But I can’t stay mad because you’re so darn cute! I haven’t known a dog this mellow since my lab, Bailey, from my childhood.  You sweet puppy. You even put up with Shasta’s constant insanity. You’re a saint.

 

Dear Shasta:
For the love of all that is good in the world, sweet girl, STOP STEALING ZULU’S FOOD!!! You piggy.  I think you’d gorge yourself to death if we didn’t keep an eye on you.
Still, your apologies are the cutest: crawling over on your belly, wiggling all over, until you’re sitting on my toes then rolling over. “Please love me, please please please? I’ll be a good dog, I promise!”
Oh, ok, I GUESS I can love you a little . . . or a lot . . . too much? So spoiled.
P.S. Do NOT EVER try to hump Zulu again.  Oh, good LORD.

Dear Kits:
So sorry, my dears.  At least the only thing you REALLY do is sleep all day, but I still miss your company on the couch.  I suppose it’s worth sacrificing that for one week to keep you alive for a few more years.
I apologize for Zulu’s rudeness. She doesn’t realize it’s horrifically tactless to stare at someone . . . or try to eat them . . . or stalk them by standing outside their door, nose to the gap between the door and the floor, for hours on end.
I’m not even kidding.

Dear Library Card:
I need you in my life again. After I left my strange, small job in my strange, small library, I’ve been without you. Let’s fix that. I need more literature in my life.  FREE literature.

Dear Jim and Josh:
It was awesome seeing you guys for the first time in three years.  Gosh, college seems like ages ago and just last week.  Sometimes, I feel like I’m still in the dorm room, straightening up for a movie night, or sneaking into the art room for secret angry finger painting, or walking down to Cups Coffee in the cool, fall air, for a study session.  Those were good times.   Have a great trip back!

Dear Chris:
 It’s the cutest when you get embarrassed.
Like when I'm whispering something flirty walking through the parking lot at work, and you go "SSHH!!! We're at work now."
So, I say, loudly, “WHAT?! We're in the PARKING LOT. Besides, I’m married to you, I’m allowed to flirt. It’s not like we’re having sex in the copy room or anything.”
And you look like you want to die on the spot. 
Oh my gosh. You’re adorable when you’re mortified.
I bet you’re making the same expression when you realize I just posted this for all the internet to read.
Haha, Chris. Ha. Ha.
Love you ;]

Dear Matt:
You're FINALLY back from Japan after 11 weeks. It's good to have you back :] Missed you tons! Now, it's back to dinner, movie, and video game nights at my place. And Rifftrax. LOVE that you're my Rifftrax buddy. So much fun. You're awesome.

Dear Self:All right, so you bought the supplies . . . Now, give your ideas a whirl. Can you create something awesome? Maybe, just maybe . . . we'll see . . .