Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Blustery Days . . .

Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best-seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
--Flannery O'Connor
Amen, Miss O'Connor. A-Bloody-Men. Because, you see, if I had my say, people like Danielle Steel, Stephanie Meyer, and all those trashy romance novelists would have never EVER had a single title printed. But, as it is, my say means so little in the publishing world, they continue to turn the young woman's mind into a pile of sentimental mush with a longing for moody, stalker boyfriends. But, I digress. I'm a cynic after all; the romantic in me died in college.

Ok, so I survived my first day of school without murder -- parents didn't brandish weapons, students resisted tantrums, and, by golly we might have actually learned something. In fact, nearly parent that I have talked with since yesterday (and, when you believe in open parent-teacher communication thru the glories of email, text, and cell phone, you talk a lot) has told me what a wonderful time her child had. Oh I hope it continues to go well. One day down . . . oh so many more months to go. :) There is still so much I'm finding out that I don't know, but, hopefully, by the end of the school year I'll have most of it down. Searching for your life's calling is an intriguing trip. Chris asked me last night if being around super cute (and oh golly are they CUUUUTE) first graders has helped me feel more excited about having spawn of my own. Yeah, no. Now, I'm beginning to think that he was in league with the principle: "Hey, could you put Sarah in a lower grade with all the cute kids? I have a feeling if she's around older, moodier ones she may never ever want to have kids so . . . help me out, here?"

Oh, and last Tuesday, taking my furry little creatures to the vet, I had my first fender bender. More like a fender bump, as the dent in my car is pathetically minuscule. Do not repeat this to the lady I hit. Oh my. In her eyes, I took out her bumper, maybe an arm and a leg. If any of you know me, you know I hate making mistakes, and, even more than that, I HATE having people upset with me. I become literally ill. So, at that moment, not only am I having to deal with my nerves about my parent orientation the next day, but now I have a short, well-dress, hair-dyed, coordinated gold accessory-ed, miniature poodle of a woman shouting at me, "You just hit my car! You were probably talking on your damn phone! You're paying for this! Sorry doesn't cut it! You're paying for it! I'm calling the police!" (ok, and no, I wasn't on my phone--I glanced behind me very quickly because I thought the cat carrier was falling in the back seat, turned around, and there was a pristine BMW in front of me . . . oops)
I didn't even realize there was damage to the car, kept apologizing profusely to her as she snapped "Sorry doesn't cut it!" The policeman came and was very matter of fact about it. His main concern was injury to our persons. Other than my ego I was fine; Miss BMW barked "NO" as if wounds were not at all the point. I cried for the next two hours. Not really sobbing, just cried. Everything was wrong, all wrong, and it was my fault. Chris was a knight in shining armor and rushed to the scene of the crime to comfort me, then picked up something for dinner so I didn't have to cook. I adore my sweet hubby :). Monday, Chris went to our insurance agent to assess the damage; apparently, Miss BMW's mood was not entirely my fault; the agent said she was insane when he had to deal with her. Then again, I'm not sure if you could expect anything other than an anal temper from someone with a name like a Nazi school marm. Yikes. But, yes, the accident was my fault, I should not have looked behind me, and people were inconvenienced by my carelessness, and I'm very, very sorry.

Eventful week around here. I hope it becomes incredibly boring soon. :)

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Taking a moment . . .

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.--Wernher von Braun

I don't know whether to scream, pass out, or just start working . . . or a combination of all three. I'm having flashbacks of college all-nighters. Mom, you may stop reading now. You know . . . the ones with filled with panic, Vault energy drink, highlighters, notebooks, and a blank computer screen? So many nights, a paper would be due in my 9 AM class, my clock said 3 AM, and of the 12 required pages of a detailed analysis were at zero. Once I didn't start a paper until the day it was due. I just couldn't get my brain to work. I had the ideas, I had the theme, I had the quotes . . . but I couldn't vomit anything intelligible onto that Word document. I wrote it in three hours and dropped it off in the office at midnight. Mom, you did not just read this paragraph . . . I got an A on that paper though. Whew. So yes, the panic, the sweat, the shortness of breath, the wandering mind, the headache . . . it's all coming back to me.

Parent orientation is this Wednesday. Meaning I have three hours to sit down with women who could probably be my mothers and tell them everything I will pour into their precious child's mind and how I'm going to do it. Oh my. Mothers are terrifying creatures. Beautiful, wonderful, but absolutely terrifying. Next tuesday, they dump their little angels into my arms and hope I don't drop them. I'm only hoping the kids don't run away kicking and screaming.
On top of that, I have had three full days of information being stuffed into my brain like an overcooked overstuffed mushroom. Delicious, lovely, but oh so overstuffed. Teacher orientation kills. It's great stuff, but it's loooooooong and it's a lot.

I'm really beginning to realize that I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing.
I've trained, I've prepped, I've thought out, I've imagined . . . but I really have no clue. If parenthood is anything at all like this, I don't know if I will ever be cut out for the job.

People keep telling me I'll do fine, so I'm trying to believe them. Trying really, really hard. Let's hope they're right.
God put me in this position for a reason; it could just be for humbling ;)

When I get worked up like this, I tend to have nightmares. I can feel them coming on. Mutant mothers with first grade math homework . . . oi vey . . .

Monday, July 19, 2010

Oh How Time Flies . . .

Currently Reading: Lilith by George MacDonald

Time does not change us. It just unfolds us.
--Max Frisch
A lot and nothing has happened here at the Bocchinos. Life seems to form a continual blur of exist. We wake, we work, we eat, we clean, we play, we find cat puke in odd corners, we sleep, we begin again. I have funny little stories to tell, but I may save those for a later post. I find I talk too much, and I write even more, so I'm trying to shut up, abbreviate, and simplify. We're all about simple and natural, now aren't we, in this modern world? Trying to catch up with that. Seems I'm always behind.

  • Library job ends this Friday. CAN I GET A WHOOP WHOOP!!?? *crowd breaks into wild applause* Yes, thank you. It's not that I hate my job--I don't. I enjoy it. I love my coworkers, I love being around books, I do not love the fear that my car will either be missing or in multiple pieces when I walk into the parking lot. The new teaching job is a great opportunity to move up, gain new knowledge and experiences, and try my hand at something. We've done secretary work, telemarketing work, retail work, and now a form of public service. I'm still looking for my passion. Maybe it's teaching, maybe it's writing, maybe it's feeding babies, don't know yet :)
  • Mom came home last week from India in mostly one piece -- she had broken a finger and stubbed her toe pretty nastily after a case of the dreaded "Delhi Belly." So glad to have her home. You can read all about her adventures here.
  • Chris has officially suckered me into World of Warcraft. We are not level 61 out of 80, an excellent team featuring an oversized attack crab named Citizen Snips. It's something to do after work for for fun, and believe it or not, some bonding. Chris loves it when I play with him. I love it when he helps clean the kitchen. We do both. Life is good.
  • Last Wednesday, my awesome friends from Mississippi/London Semester, Jonathan and Kailen Reves came over for dinner. They just moved to Fort Lauderdale, and were spending the week at the Universal Parks. Awesome couple. Miss them lots :(
  • We continue to really enjoy our time at Grace Fellowship Church. Now if we could just find a way to meet more people . . . hmmmm . . .
  • Spent an awesome evening with Chris's good friend Alyssa and her three little ones. Alyssa's husband, Adam, was away for Naval training in Mississippi, so hopefully we'll get to see all five of them, soon. Love this family.
  • Against all odds, we have a new cat.


This is a bad picture of Pipkin after her first bath because . . . well . . . she sort of smelled like poop. Two baths later, she smells better . . . but she's a love bug so we look past her odors. Navi tries to help by grooming and chasing her around the apartment (it took them two days to figure out that they love each other). It was one of those moments, looking in the adoption kitty section of PetsMart, where, against all odds, a tiny kitten wins you over and you can't leave without her. So yes . . . new cat . . .

As I type this, Chris is eagerly awaiting WoW playtime. We're night owls. G'nite!